The Business of Breastfeeding

On my way to work every morning, while driving on SR-14 east, I always pass by the Beaches billboard, which is familiar to most Vancouverites. Though sponsored by the waterfront restaurant, the billboard usually displays a message unrelated to it, as they must allow random advertisers and individuals to pay for the space. They change it pretty frequently--almost daily--so there is always something new to read. Oftentimes, it advertises some upcoming event, but most of the time it displays a personal message for a known passerby. For example, today it read, "Happy birthday, Bob, you're old. From, Dirt." I have also seen propositions for dates and brief love notes posted. However, lately, the billboard has been dominated by sporadic plugs for breastfeeding. Who sponsors these, I do not know, but there have been several. One of them read, "Breast milk never gets recalled," while others have had similarly snarky quips. Most of these haven't bothered me, but the most recent one has, for some reason, gotten under my skin. It said, "Normalize breastfeeding! Nurse in public!"

Now, the reason this irks me is not because I harbor some illogical animosity towards breastfeeding, but because it sparks an issue I have heard a lot about in recent years: whether or not it's appropriate to nurse openly in public. I was also a bit annoyed by the use of "normalize" in the message because, to me, breastfeeding is considered quite normal in our culture. I realize that a few decades ago, there was a trend towards using formula in lieu of breast milk, which I assume was based on a flawed assumption that breast milk was somehow less healthy for the baby. However, this trend is so dated that I don't even know the real reason behind it. I and all my siblings were breastfed, and this has been the case for most people I know. I constantly hear commentary from the medical community that breastfeeding is healthy for both baby and mom, and as someone who has associated closely with feminist circles, I have been exposed to plenty of pro-breastfeeding rhetoric. Additionally, it seems the message is prevalent in the mainstream, and I never hear anyone say, "Breastfeeding is dirty!" (or anything to that end).

If breastfeeding publicly is what it takes for certain people to be convinced that it has been normalized, then I still don't know what the problem is because I would certainly say it's not uncommon to witness a woman nursing in public. However, I want to pursue this notion a bit further because I think there are issues in the logic of free-for-all breastfeeding. I don't mind if a woman nurses in a public place, provided that she uses some type of covering (blanket, jacket, shirt, etc.) to shield unsuspecting passers-by from her nude breast. There have been instances in which I have seen women I don't know from Eve just whip it out with no discretion (including a woman in a string bikini at the Fort Vancouver 4th of July firework show one year...), and to me, this is just inconsiderate. I am uncomfortable with seeing the breasts of someone I don't know well (if at all) randomly exposed to me in a place where random breasts are not slated to be exposed. I wouldn't even classify myself as a prude; I just find this inappropriate. Now, I know many proponents of public breastfeeding (sans cover-up) would argue that I am simply uncomfortable with it because I'm not used to seeing it often enough, and that I should just get over it. I believe I have commonly heard the argument phrased like so: "It's JUST a boob, stop making it into something sexual and deal with it!" This is where the logic gets fuzzy for me. You see, natural and necessary activities such as relieving one's bowels, changing one's clothes, or picking one's nose are certainly considered normal; they are not condemned and they are not considered unhealthy or shameful, provided they occur in private. I don't want to see someone pop a squat and take a crap right in front of me at the mall, so why would I want to see you pop out your nipple for your infant to suckle? It's not about sexualizing women's bodies in this case--there is nothing sexually appealing to me about a woman breastfeeding, for the record--it's just that there are some things in life we don't need to see a stranger do, and nursing is one of them. Again, if the baby is whining and it can't wait for the bathroom, the car, or the home, I have no qualms about a mother breastfeeding discreetly, but I don't understand the recent push for nursing to be so in-your-face. Am I alone on this? Perhaps I just don't understand the issue because I'm not a mother, so if someone has a different perspective to share on this, I welcome it. I try to be sensitive to issues like this because it's not fair for one to feel condemned or "abnormal" for doing something that is not only essential, but also perfectly morally sound. However, I guess I'm just not enough of a hippie to see the value in eliminating social mores that exist for good reasons.

As a quick tangential, for the sake of emphasis, I'd like to share that when I worked as a student office assistant in the Women's Studies Department at PSU, a professor, who shall remain unnamed, came into the office one day with her toddler--yes, TODDLER--and in the middle of a conversation with another student and myself, started breastfeeding her. Now, in her defense, she may have assumed that, because she was in a woman-centered, progressive environment, it was a "safe space" for her to do this. I suppose in that regard it wasn't the worst place for her to flop out her rather sizable mammary gland, but this fact aside, I found it wildly inappropriate that she would do this in a professional atmosphere, while on the job, in front of two students with whom she did not have a close relationship. Perhaps some of her colleagues were not opposed to this, but why would she automatically assume we were? I was extremely uncomfortable, unsure of where to rest my gaze, as I didn't want to stare at her breast but found it nearly impossible not to. Whatever conversation we were having was immediately shot to hell because of the mental gymnastics I was doing to avoid registering utter discomfort and distaste on my face. I won't even get into the weirdness of nursing a child that could feasibly chew steak (to semi-quote an episode of Sex and the City) because I think the general situation speaks for itself. Those of you reading this who may find my opinion on the matter to be somewhat conservative, please tell me, would you start nursing your child, without warning and without covering, in front of a coworker or client? For example, if you were a therapist, would you do it in front of your patient while they were trying to talk about their day? For me, it's not a matter of what the breastfeeder is comfortable with, it's a matter of what the onlooker(s) is comfortable with--common courtesy. Had she even so much as interjected a brief, "Do you mind if I nurse?" it would have been more appropriate. Again, if I'm missing the point, someone please tell me, but in my humble opinion, the business of breastfeeding should remain inconspicuous.